holy schmoly

I nearly blew my top when I read this on the internet.
How can a self respecting Indian woman allow this to happen ? She had to slap the old geezer right on the face SMACK!! like that. On top of that she was giggling.All over india protestors were shouting slogans and burning effigies throwing Mr Gere's schedule out of gear. I wanted to join the morcha too, however I was delayed when the train I was travelling on was canceled due to protestors burning compartments and throwing stones. They were protesting the hike in train fares.

The ignorant Americans think we Indians are so backward but little do they know that we have progressed so much in the last 10 years.
Women can now travel INSIDE a bus.
The marriageble age for girls has now been increased to 12.
It is no longer forbidden to hold hands of a woman in public view provided the woman in question is your wife and both of your age must exceed 85 and it must be a full moon day.
Numerous malls have sprung up everywhere where people can visit and spend useful time of their life appreciating the marvel of engineering.

Home ministry has released a confidential US document that New Delhi is the most livable city in India. He said it doesnt matter much that it has been ranked 248 in list of 300 cities world wide.
George W Bush confirmed that New Delhi indeed has jumped 1 place in the last 5 years from 249th to 248.Earlier 248th position was occupied by Baghdad. The cabinet ministers have relased a statement that due to rapid progress in social, economical & mental factors in New Delhi and due to sheer perseverance, hard work & talent we were able to over take Baghdad in the livability-index. Iraq home minister was unavalaible for comment when Manmohan excitedly tried to call him to deliver the news. (Editor: we later learnt that he was infact shot down while he was in the toilet and hence the non-response contratry to some non-believers that he was JUST not interested in the news)

Meanwhile in other unrelated reports Times Of India decided to whole heartedly support Sanjaya in his quest for glory on the American Idol.
TOI, being quite a patriotic newspaper, picks up anything or anyone distantly related to India (even if they are the 100th generation which is quite wierd since we could well be the 70th generation of the Australopithecus ) in the US to showcase how much our generation is progressing. The lad in question, Sanjaya, however could not pin point on which continent India lay even after 5 attempts. His Italian mother however brushed off the incident as one-off and confirmed that Sanajaya is an typical yank.

Cabinet ministers are meeting tomorrow to perform a havan for Sanjayas success. Lalu has released a report that the cricket team's stumps and bats will be used to the havan. The priest who performed the havan for Indian cricket team is missing and the Delhi police are tight lipped about this situation. Sonia Gandhi has declared that it will be a weeks bandh and goverment office will not function inorder to mourn incase Sanjaya is kicked out of the contest.

United Nations released a statement that "There is too much hunger in the rest of the world and more food is required." The whole statement was a flop as the Indian ministers didnt knew what or who United Nations were. The Europeans didnt know what "hunger" was. Africa didnt know what "Food" was while United States didnt knew what "rest of the world" was.


Viva La India !